Seems to be just the beginning

Maybe i’m grieving… I don’t know.  But me and Church at the moment is a wierd thing.  Came home from it yesterday and felt totally depressed.  Moped around for the rest of the day as a result.  Am wavering between being committed to the cause and wanting to chuck it all in.

I’ve got lots of questions…

Is this about being the ‘comfortable’ church?
Is God showing/ telling me something of what He sees/ feels?
If so, why, when I don’t have the energy or desire, or even the ability (?) to do something about it?  Ability is the wrong word… can’t find the one I want.
Would changing churches actually solve things?
Am I brave enough to leave?  (I’ve spent so long being the ‘good’ girl…)
Am I making more of this than it really is?
Is the little child in me upset because she’s not getting her own way?

What’s the point?  Who’s going to answer these questions and would knowing the answer actually help me?  I’m sad.

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2 responses to “Seems to be just the beginning

  1. Comfortable churches (in my opinion) are dangerous churches. A church that’s comfortable won’t expect anything from God because they don’t need it. Why has the church become comfortable? What’s missing? The church should be trying to move, to question itself and it’s motives. Should be asking, ‘What direction are we heading and why?’ A church should be uncomfortable so that it seeks more of God. Asking God more questions. Questioning their faith. Questioning the institution. I wonder whether certain events happened in ‘the church’ (not your church) to stir up the comfortableness ,to make it uncomfortable so that more people changed the way the church worked. To get God moving in the church again.
    As for whether you should stay there or not I can’t say. All I think you should do is ask how you can help shake the church up and get it’s bum moving again. If it doesn’t seem to be possible you could move on to somewhere more willing to change. It’s all well and good to have great carpet and a lovely lawn with nice pavers but if God has been left in the garden, how is he supposed to change peoples lives?

  2. Thing is, I don’t know if the church knows it.

    I’ve made a decision- and I’m happy with it. See
    https://jafa73.wordpress.com/2006/10/30/made-a-decision/

    Jane 🙂

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