Had a lovely 24 hours or so with one of my nephews sleeping over. We went ice skating and had a lot of fun together. Memories I will cherish forever.
This afternoon I’ve been really teary and upset- a mix, I thought of being cold (I got wet at baseball today) and tired. Unexpectedly, a couple of hours sleep later I’m still upset.
There is evidence everywhere of my nephew being here. Lego on the floor and a tree house Lego sculpture he made for me. Remnants of play dough hair from when he played with my ‘buzz cuts’ play dough toy.
My heart is asking ‘why’? Why did I miss out on having children of my own? What is wrong with me that no one ever wanted to be with me, let alone have a family with me?
I have so much love within me to give and share… and here I am all alone. I get that I’m feeling sorry for myself right now, but it still doesn’t address the underlying desire I have to be a mum.
Echo 