Was the ‘adult supervision’ for my sister today with a group of her friends. Makes me feel old, but I guess compared to her I am- I am 20 years older than her! All of a sudden she is growing up. Was fun though to see her interacting confidently with her peers.
Went back to the doctors this week about the depression… to go back again in a month… seems like it’s the beginning of a journey. I’d like to think that the decisions and changes that I’ve made have made a difference, but it’s too hard to tell after a few weeks. I am enjoying spending time on the exercise bike- hopefully there will be some weight changes too!
Happy Australia Day
Have decided to not get bogged down into ‘depression’ mode. I don’t have the right words to really describe what is going on so I’m not going to try.
Have follwed up on my decision re church (see Made a Decision). I took myself off the music roster for 3 months and took myself off the ‘Kids Spot’ roster altogether. Still on cleaning but that’s ok for now. I visited Northside Christian Life Centre (? not sure if correct name) over the last 2 weeks- one morning and one evening service. Haven’t been there for about 10 years so was good to see how it was going. Might appear to be a huge leap going from an Anglican church to an AOG, but it’s not that large a leap for me. Doesn’t feel like ‘home’, but I’m comfortable enough to go by myself (even with all my baggage and protective walls!). I’m working on it.
School goes back next week- where has January gone? Am happy to go back to my CPS work if I can make some changes, which I can do as I have a lot of choice about what I do at the school. Is going to be weird though- can I be a support to the children and their families while struggling myself? Not sure yet, but we’ll see.
who am I trying to kid?… I hate new year celebrations… I go to bed early and hope not to wake up when the fireworks go off… a party pooper I know, but that’s how it is.
not much to say really… my brain is fuddled and my emotional thermometer confused… just trying to get through each day one at a time
no more words